2007 Monthly Letter
has been an awesome year! Each weekend I have seen from 35-45
people pray to make personal decisions for Jesus Christl That's
an average total of 1120 (40 x 28 Weekends.) Plus, the multitudes
of men, women, and children whose lives are profoundly affected
when given opportunities to apply God's Word. I know you have
sensed God's Divine Timing in each letter.
The weekend after Veteran's Day was the samel God chose
to honor Capt. Steve Moore, a Vietnam Veteran, in a healing
way! Please read his heart wrenching testimony now
and notice both the date when he wrote it and when he was
in Vietnam. Then read the rest of this letter to see
what God had in store for this physically and emotionally
wounded Veteran on November 16-18, 2007.
Holy Spirit entwined my life with Steve's as he applied God's
Word. He knelt at a wooden cross and pounded four symbolic
nails of forgiveness. I saw the Holy Spirit speak directly
to his heart and apply some healing balm. The Spirit had enabled
him to take some Giant Steps forward toward his "inner
Remember Steve's final words "I hurt even to this day
as those memories return to mv mind and heart."
This day in November was a time God had prepared for him!
pounded his nails into the cross ... then went to a wall ..
and began to weep. God simply used me to provide a shoulder
to cry on, arms to embrace him, and ears to listen to him
talk throughout the whole Weekend about his hurts and pains
of war. But Jesus was the One who provided the healing!
the close of the Sunday service, Steve gave me a present.
It was a small model of the "Duster"-the killing machine that
literally turned everything in its way to dust! For me it
was the perfect symbol of giving up of his past and a release
of the deep pain that went with it. I treasure it because
it represents what Jesus is abie and wiliing to do-turn a
pained warrior into a soldier at Peace!
Finally, can you imagine how the Spirit was also working when
we sang the old hymns "Nothing but the Blood of Jesus"
and the words "My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus'
Blood and righteousness." Both of these songs are S.O.P.
- Standard Operating Procedure during each Weekend. Both became
Spirit Operating-on-the-heart-and-mind Procedure during this
What do you think? Maybe UpBuilding Ministries should be called
Divine Appointment Ministries' God certainly has blessed us
with many of them!
is Steve's letter: "I just can't get the blood
off my hands!"
battle on 21 Aug 67 lasted well over 6 hours. It was easy
to shoot and kill the enemy with my 40mm guns on the Duster
or even with my M16 because they were some distance away.
On this day though, the enemy got just a few feet in front
of me. For a brief moment I looked into his eyes and saw his
hatred, his fear, and his very soul and in a split second
took his life with my bare hands. His blood covered me. Now
the war became personal.
I lost six men that day and there were about 35 Marines killed.
When possible, I would help the wounded by applying bandages
and soon their blood would cover my hands. But I could not
spend much time with them, after all, the enemy was still
fighting hard and we needed to stop them. After we were able
to finally defeat the enemy, we began to gather everyone up
and make sure they were all accounted for. As I helped the
wounded onto the Duster, their blood began to cover my uniform.
Then I began to help retrieve the dead, picking them up ever
so carefully, in sort of a reverent manner. They did not know
how we picked them up, but we all felt it only right to respect
them as best as we could. Now their blood began to cover me
Finally we started to head back to Calu. I rode in the last
Duster, wanting to make sure everyone made it back safely.
The stench of combat was very heavy. The smell of hot oil
from the barrels that were still smoldering, the smell of
elephant grass that had been blasted away, the sweet smell
of napalm that had been dropped by many jets and burned the
countryside and anything that was on it. Exhaust from the
hot engines covered the area along with the gunpowder from
every kind of weapon fired. Bodies that had died early on
in the battle began to smell of death already because of the
Warm sticky blood covered my hands and my fingers began to
stick together. Blood from the enemy mixed with my blood and
the blood of my men. As I looked at my hands during the ride
back to camp, my mind would revisit the battle scene. What
part of the blood was that of the men whom I had just killed
with my bare hands, what part was mine, what part was from
the dead or wounded of my men? I kept moving my fingers and
watched as the skin clung together. Oh how I wish I could
erase the images in my head but they were engraved there now
We arrived at camp and loaded the wounded and dead unto the
waiting choppers. We watched them for as long as we could
while they disappeared into the now dark sky. Then silence
was upon us and it was deafening. My ears began ringing ever
so loud from the constant firing of our guns and it would
not go away.
My eyes looked at my hands one more time. They were bright
red. Taking my canteen, I filled my helmet with the small
amount of water that was left after the battle. Dipping my
hands into the water, the blood began to loosen around my
fingers but it would not come off. I reached down, grabbed
a handful of sand and began to rub my hands together. The
grit started to remove the blood but could not remove the
color. My hands were red and I could not get rid of it.
heart ached so much and there was no one to talk to about
it. I dare not let my men see how I felt. After all, I needed
them to be ready to follow me into the next battle. I could
not show any fear, anger, or any emotion whatsoever. I forced
myself to stay rock solid so that they would follow me into
another battle without any hesitation.
Another battle came all to soon and once again I would become
covered with new blood. I hurt even to this day as those memories
return to my mind and heart. Copyright 5 Aug 03 Captain
L. Steven Moore Vietnam 1967-1968